Thursday, July 29, 2010

Cute and Funny Story

During the bedtime routine after I had fed the girls tonight, I was tidying up and getting ready for our big weekend away and I heard the following "conversation" behind me:

Victoria: (flipping over onto her stomach) BURP!

Caitlyn: "hehe"

I burst out laughing it was so CUTE!!! They were facing each other and looking each other in the eye so Caitlyn's giggle was for sure in response to Victoria's burp! Their very first conversation and I really hope that this means they will be best friends for life!

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Writer's Block

I haven't written in a while. I've started many posts but haven't completed them. Some of them are just titles and then I sit there and stare at the screen, lots of stuff whirling around in my head and none of it making it onto the page in front of me.

After thinking about this for some time, I think I've finally figured out what was causing my "writer's block". After everything that we have been through to get to this point, I know we got lucky. I know that every day that I get to stare into my beautiful babies' eyes. I know that not everyone that walks along the road of IF get to take the turnpike marked "BABY". There are still a large number of my sisters who are still yearning for their babies and not knowing how or if they will be able to have them at all. Like I said, I know we got lucky.

I feel somehow that since I got to have children, that the Universe smiled at me one day and IVF finally worked for me, I've lost my right to have any concerns. Life should be simply perfect shouldn't it? What more could I possibly want? I have a loving husband, two beautiful children, a wonderful dog, supportive friends and have worries after having achieved the dream seems almost obnoxious. Sometimes I feel as if having concerns is like having complaints and that seems like I'm being entirely ungrateful for what I do have but that is not the case.

I didn't struggle with what to write about when we were cycling and contemplating next steps for treatment...IF was my rallying cry and I had found this wonderful online community with others like me. Now, I feel as though when I write about things, I must tread carefully, softly, for who wants to read whiny blog posts when so many are still chasing the dream? I've dabbled in writing about the day to day activities of my girls but that seems false and trite in light of the struggles of IF. It feels as if I am rubbing it in and that is not my intention at all. I feel like my posts should be all sunshine and light and anything but is a betrayal of every infertile's dream.

I can see that I have lots of visitors from all over the world and I'm curious to know a few things. Why do you read my blog? Are you reading this blog because you came across this from my IF blog and want to know where I am at now? Are you a new parent like I am? Is there anything that you would like to ask me about being on this side of the fence? I'd like to hear from you and I invite those who have been lurking for a while to drop me a line to tell me what you find interesting about my blog.

For now, I've decided that the central theme to my blog posts will be just as my tag line says...I am a new parent and I am trying to figure things out. I mean no one any disrespect and I am not complaining, truly. This is the place where I do it and like IF, I appreciate the advice and opinions to help me navigate through parenthood.

So that's it...all figured out for now.

Thanks for reading.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Rolling Right Along & Vaccine

Victoria has rolled over for the first time from her back to her front two nights ago! Granted, she was extremely frustrated trying to do so and she complained for about a half hour before actually being able to do it but she did it after being put to bed Tuesday night. We could see her trying and trying on the video monitor and she wiggled her way off camera and then all of a sudden, we noticed that we could see her bum facing up. Way to go girl!

The funny thing was that after all that hard work, she then proceeded to get stuck and complained about being on her tummy as she decided that she didn't like that position either and could we please turn her back over? She hasn't mastered the art of getting her shoulder out of the way so she turns her head and her whole body face down but then her shoulders remain unturned. Still a work in progress but she has done it once already. Our little girl is growing up!

Caitlyn calmly rolls over on her side with no issues but she hasn't yet made the full rotation to her tummy. She has started squirming around her crib though which was the first sign that Victoria was going to roll. We will often not find either one of them where we left them to fall asleep. Both our girls like to dangle their feet between the crib slats and we will often come into their room to find their little feet sticking out. It's really cute but I worry about their feet getting caught.

In other news, our girls got their second booster shot today for the diptheria/tetanus/polio vaccine and they had an awful reaction. We had decided to split up their vaccine shots so that they are only receiving one shot per month and I'm glad that we did as they seem to react in some way every time. So far it has been mostly irritability and crankiness after the shot with one rash after the last one for poor Victoria. This time, Victoria's little leg swelled up like a balloon and it was really red and painful to the touch. I accidentally was touching it while changing her diaper and she was just screaming in pain poor thing. We put cool cloths on it to stop the swelling and gave them both some Tylenol to help with the pain. Caitlyn's leg was not half as bad as Victoria's but it was still painful for her as she would cry as well when I touched her leg.

I had to call my Mom to help me this afternoon as Victoria would not allow me to put her down and I couldn't feed Caitlyn without an extra set of hands around. It was kind of funny actually - both girls were crying loudly in the background when I called my parents' house and when my Dad answered the phone, he could hear them crying away and me trying to soothe them saying "It's're okay girls" and he called for my Mom right away without even saying hello!

The girls were not running fevers and were still able to eat and nurse okay and I was even able to get them to nap in the afternoon so they were just highly uncomfortable from the shot. They were much fussier at bedtime tonight so we did no sleep training tonight. My goal was to comfort them as much as possible so they could sleep the poor things. Hopefully they will have slept off the effects of the vaccine and will wake up happy again tomorrow. My DH also came home early as he was really concerned when he heard how awfully they were reacting to the vaccine so he helped me to get through the late afternoon and evening.

I always think I can take care of them on my own but days like today with the vaccine really shake my confidence as I literally need another set of hands to hold one while I feed/comfort/carry the other one. Has anyone else's kids had bad reactions to the vaccine shots? How did you deal with it?